Maybe Shirley was right

25 Jul


Maybe talking to the wall is the thing to do.  Not so long ago I often used to be juggling two or three IM windows of conversations, while posting on a bulletin board or actively participating in a chat room.  My email box was daily into double digits of
genuine emails from real people with something to say.

Somehow my world has closed in on its self. There are almost no emails arriving despite the numerous ones sent out to family, friends and acquaintances, there are no IM conversations and the postings on bulletins have all but ceased.  Since finishing work and being ensconced at home my conversation skills and topics have diminished as has my zeal for public interaction.  So many of my conversations, or mails seem to have me talking in the past tense, “When I went sailing to ….”, “When I was working at …”, “When I used to …..”, etc.  I feel like a piece of clockwork mechanism whose springs are slacking that even when they are fully wound the energy lasts but a moment.

The body is weakening and taking the spirit down with it.  The hobby interests are fading, I have not picked up a needle to cross stitch this year, and that is unusual.  The computer and internet fails to hold my attention for long, same with television.   At the core of all this is my muscular dystrophy, that foisted upon unwanted debilitating muscle wasting condition that means even sitting here and typing is causing numbness, strain and discomfort.   My erratic sleep pattern has placed me in the ‘no sleeping’ phase and added a headache for good measure, or maybe it is the seagulls squawking that is the cause of that.  I don’t know.

I’d really like a holiday, but holidays are little relief and generally add more difficulties with my specific needs.  Maybe some resort could offer chemically induced coma’s, book in for three days and zonk out.

Hey ho, such is life.  I love the friends who do take the time to keep in touch with me, at least there is someone out there beyond my front door who acknowledges my existence.



Posted by on July 25, 2010 in Uncategorized


Tags: , ,

6 responses to “Maybe Shirley was right

  1. Me

    July 26, 2010 at 6:24 am

    Hey there… I’m a guilty party in this for the past few days. Haven’t talked to you in a few I’m afraid. I am about to call you though, when the hour is right and beg you to come over tomorrow. I not only want your companionship and conversation… I need it. And that, my dear, will never change.

    You mean the world to me my darling dear and that is a fact. Hope you can come over. No I can’t lift you exactly but we will work things out and if you stay over we can sleep on a mattress on the office floor if we have to. 🙂

    Love You Muchly,
    Me x


  2. Hazel

    July 26, 2010 at 4:31 pm

    Shirley who?


    • amgroves

      July 27, 2010 at 10:14 am

      Shirley Valentine, from the movie, she talked to her kitchen wall.


  3. Caruso

    July 26, 2010 at 5:06 pm

    I think Mario Lanza use to have himself put into a coma for a week or so at a time as a way to drop those unwanted pounds.


  4. Sigmund

    July 27, 2010 at 1:18 am

    It seems to me that rather than deteriorating, you may be in the process of maturing and blossoming. You sound like you need to take your brain onto a higher plane. Explore new depths of yourself and that big world out there. Your body may be limited but your mind is sharp and ready to party. There must be thousands of people in similar situations, (lazy bodies- brilliant minds) you need to find each other, stimulate each other. Think about it; think about how to connect and grow. Yeah I do think you are going thru a mental growth spurt and your brain is itchin to be scratched.


    • Kim Arnold

      August 3, 2010 at 10:33 am

      I like the way Sigmund put this. He is seeing a glass half full. Sigmund feel free to come and talk me out of my slump any time. I could use an encouraging word as well! 🙂



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